Shame

This is Charisse.

Last week in class, professor Nerio asked us about shame. As a country with deep protestant ties, the idea of shame is a familiar one. Even though society has become more and more tolerant of certain things, there is a deeply rooted set of values. There are things that are seen as proper behavior and things that are not. Some of my generation thinks nothing of premarital sex, of living with a partner before marriage, or of never getting married at all. However, there is still a feeling of rebellion associated with these behaviors.

I will not try to speak for others, but I would assume that I am not the only one that feels this way. I believe that people should be free to live their lives in whatever way pleases them. However, I constantly resist the urges that I have to do certain things. I have become quite adept at setting aside my Christian upbringing when it comes to judging others, but not when it comes to restricting myself. I always hesitate before reading curse words and a part of me is saddened by the fact that before I college, I never cursed and now I barely notice when expletives escape from my lips.

I did not drink alcohol before I turned 21 and even now, I hesitate to order a drink. When I do order one, I feel as if I am doing something rebellious, like I am taking part in something forbidden. I still have take solace in the fact that I have never been out to a club or been intoxicated. I hold onto these things as something that defines me. I do not know why these things are important to me, but I wonder how many other people feel this way.

Earlier this week, I visited the post secret website and I saw the following post card:

 

The girl who wrote this secret feels guilty about shaving certain areas of her body. I cannot imagine that someone explicitly told her that shaving her vaginal area was something bad, but it is the idea that she may be shaving for someone else that prompts her to feel this way. She felt the need to stress the fact that she is a virgin, even though the post card was sent anonymously. Even in her confession, she cannot escape the part of herself that feels guilty about her action.

We live in a society where sex sells, where chastity is very rarely discussed. Why is it that despite this, there are still people that feel guilt about certain sexual behaviors, about drinking practices, etc.?

This idea of shame is an important one. Perhaps we need to take a closer look at the lasting effects of a Protestant reign.